How does she become herself? Or more importantly, how did she lose herself in the first place? That is a question that women have asked for eternity.
Let’s venture into that question with Maggie, a fictional character who represents every woman with a secret desire to live a more conscious, self-aware and creative life.
The Before Picture
Though Maggie is not usually aware of it, she tends to follow the ‘rules’ without really acknowledging where they came from. Most of the time she doesn’t even know what they are. She never allows for any need to become herself.
Her life consists of conforming, shoulds and shouldn’ts, lost dreams. Like a leaf tossed in the wind, she is at the mercy of the whims of others and her outward circumstances.
Feelings of doubt, fear and anxiety pervade her life. Her trance state is so deep that she doesn’t know she’s in a trance state. She throws on the cloak of invisibility because it’s safe, and at the same time she is angry about not being seen and heard.
She can’t yet see the paradox that constrains her.
Until Maggie can voice to herself in a way that can’t be denied that she doesn’t like her life now, she can’t change any of it.
Inside though, in a secret place hidden in the recesses of her mind, something in her is rebelling. She finds herself feeling constantly resentful, a signal she wants to break out of her prison.
Be careful, Maggie!
Because behind the scenes, the universe is preparing to answer her unspoken invitation to become herself.
And the response always comes in an unexpected form.
Something Shakes Her Foundations
Maggie is unprepared for the earthquake that rocks her world. These life changing earthquakes can come in many guises. It could be a car accident, an illness, a job loss. In Maggie’s case it’s a failed relationship. The loss shakes Maggie to her core.
The earthquake’s purpose is not to ruin Maggie’s life. In fact, she called it in as a result of her hidden dreams and visions.
Its purpose is to activate awareness and awaken consciousness. From deep inside Maggie comes an impulse to rise up and question the nature of the world and her place in it. She joins the countless women who are ready to be more than our culture says we can be.
She begins to question the structure she has built her life on.
What has Maggie not seen, and why has she not seen it?
She does spend some time feeling sorry for herself. But questions and insights start to creep into her conscious mind and though she thrashes against the idea, she begins to understand that nothing about her life was as it seemed.
It’s frustrating and frightening but Maggie is awakening. She exists in a messy place, full of confusing thoughts and difficult emotions. She has many more questions than there are answers. It’s exhausting, and she has no energy for anything but her own dark night of the soul.
But eventually, as she finds a willingness to say yes! to diving deep, she begins to catch glimpses of herself as a creator that are beyond anything she could imagine.
Maggie Shouts “I Get It. It’s Me!”
Like a light going on, Maggie begins to understand, “It’s all about ME!”
Where Maggie has been blaming external conditions and others for the state of her life, she knows now it’s all about her, discovering how to become herself, and her purpose for her lifetime.
She is comprehending herself as a unique being who can make choices in all areas of her life. She still feels wobbly and yet she is seeing the beginning of power within, self leadership and personal transformation.
It’s not that easy for Maggie to allow her old life structures to fall. They were what she counted on for so long and so far, nothing has arrived to take their place.
Maggie is in a kind of neutral zone where the old no longer exists but the new ways have not been formed yet. It takes great patience for Maggie to stay in the space where things are foggy and unclear.
Never Miss the Weekly Post
She is tempted to fall into self pity as she asks if there will ever be clarity again. Yet, Maggie has an underlying sense of moving in the right direction.
As she begins to look for what she values in her new world, more of it begins to flow her way.
Next Question to Become Herself is “Now What?”
Now that Maggie is experiencing the sparks of insight, she wonders how she is supposed to exist in a culture and paradigm that’s still focuses on outer circumstances to determine how to live life.
How does she create from that new understanding when outer forces seem to push against it? The people who were part of her old life no longer seem to fit Maggie’s life, and she wonders if that means she will be alone.
It’s a frightening thought.
But Maggie has ventured too far and seen too much of what is possible to return to the way things were. She begins to recognize there is some kind of Divine Order and becoming more available to it moves her forward even when she doesn’t know logically how to proceed.
She finds a new way to understand and act from her own true north. Her ‘yebbuts’ turn into stepping stones. Conflict and difficulties point her back to her highest and best self.
Maggie asks, she listens and she course-corrects as she receives answers. Everything is useful information in order to find her new learning edge, She finds her purpose, not because there’s only one and she has to search until she finds it, but because she can choose what fits her like a glove.
Maggie Finds a New Tribe
Maggie begins to meet others who have gone through or are going through what she did. She discovers that though many from her old life have fallen away, the new people are kindred spirits becoming part of her new life.
Sharing her own journey has a powerful impact on those who are part of her new community. A ripple effect occurs where those who are on the same journey move out and gather others who are on a similar path of self awareness.
Her alteration in frequency, her shift to living from an open heart, her new state of grace, begin to attract more and more like-minded people.
As they come, as Maggie is feeling more and more on purpose in her life, her life takes on a richness that was beyond what she ever could have thought possible. She feels joy and appreciation in providing loving service to those who come into her path.
Maggie has become herself. And her SELF.
And because a life journey is never done, it begins again.
What is your latest learning edge? Please share in the comments.